- Category: Date Night Adventures
- Published Date
- Written by Dr. Love & Marriage
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Welcome to Date Night Adventures. If you and your spouse already have a regularly scheduled time apart from the kids, then jump right into the Date Night Adventures Blog. If you like most and struggling to reconnect with your mate, we hope this site offers helpful ideas to get you started.
What Is Date Night
Let's do some visualization exercises . . . try to remember back to when you first met your spouse or, if that is too far back, try to remember the time you spent together before you made that lifelong commitment to your spouse.
- What things did you do together?
- What sort of things made you laugh together?
- What feelings did you experience during those times together?
Date Night is similar to those experiences.
Why Is Date Night Essential
Date Night is just as important for the children as it is for dad and mom. This does not mean that the children go out with you. (Even though that should be done separately - but we will cover that on another page.) Simply stated, if mom and dad are connected, in sync, and unified then the whole family is stronger. To use an analogy, when dad and mom spend alone time they add fuel to the tank of their family so all other aspects of the family continue to run well.
Meaningful Time Versus Occupying Space in Each Other's Vicinity
There is definitely a strong difference between having a deep conversation across a cafe table and sitting next to someone on a couch watching a television show. However, it is completely unreasonable to expect every moment you spend together to be a scene out of a romance novel. Establishing a regular time is more important than filling it with perfect moments. The purpose is to provide the space in your busy lives for meaningful time to possibly happen. While quantity wins out over quality, it would be counterproductive to the family if all you did together week after week was occupy space next to each other.
The Real Goal
Spending time together provides the opportunity for the connection. It is the same as every other aspect of familycapers.com: doing things together builds bonds that help families endure. This is exactly the same for dad and mom. Too often we have seen couples that based their existence only on their children. They typically have no connections once their children grow up and start their own families, and eventually they drift apart completely. Date night should provide a guilt-free scheduled time for mom and dad to connect regularly.
So . . . what to do?
Get the calendar out and pick one day a week that you can spend time together away from the kids. Make this day sacred and lock it in. Sure there are all kinds of logistical issues to be worked out such as who will watch the kids and what can you do on a tight budget. These and other problems are secondary to the commitment you need to make to your relationship. Once you have established the necessity of Date Night, your creativity will kick in and solutions will present themselves. Read our adventures for ideas and solutions to problems we have stumbled through.
What are you waiting for? Get your calendars out and start scheduling!